Miley Cyrus: Exploited Teen or Hipster Douchebag?

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I’m going to go with a 70/30 split here, because frankly at around 17 young Ms. Cyrus is old enough to know that the Teen Choice Awards aren’t the place to practice your pole dancing, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t Cyrus’ idea to introduce the ‘tweens watching this fiasco which also featured a woman most teens would never have heard of (Kathy Griffin) holding hands with a degenerate no teen should be alone with (Levi Johnston) as a precursor to what wasn’t so much an award show but a virtual molestation of every child watching.

Now look, I’m no prude but I prefer my strippers to be a) of age and b) out of sight of anyone who still watches the Teen Choice Awards, an audience primarily made up of 12-year-old girls and pedophiles. What exactly is the purpose of a pole dance by a 17-year-old girl who looks 15 years old, aside from providing spank material to perverts and creating some very difficult situations for teachers this fall when all the 4th graders start doing their “Miley” dance for the talent show?

One purpose I can think of is to stroke the ego of a petulant teen millionaire who thought it’d be “ironic” and “cool” to mock the millions of women in America who didn’t have the benefit of a celebrity father and pedophilic pop culture to make them rich, and support themselves, their children and often some deadbeat girlfriend through swinging around a pole surrounded by people so jaded and bored with life that she has to hang from the pole like a bat to get tips. Another purpose is to add a few years to the career of a girl who should be looking into college by tarting her up so that the legions of parasites whose business is selling Miley Cyrus don’t have to slap lipstick on some 8th grader and get Vanity Fair to photograph her in a thong. After all, such things take years of grooming, ask any child molester.

But what this boils down to is the kind of idiotic move all teens with no proper guidance pull when they’re trying to be seen as an adult but never had much opportunity to mature. Frankly I’ve seen worse, but nothing so public and that’s the point. Cyrus still markets herself to children yet wants to put on some low rent go-go show designed to make adults uncomfortable, children confused and titillate the hipster crowd with her “empowering embrace” of what can politely be called burlesque only because of the sad state of burlesque shows these days, which are little more than vanity driven passion plays for trust fund babies to get back at their absentee fathers. Cyrus’ performance was much more suggestive than most burlesque and that’s where some adult should have stepped in and said no. I mean by the gods who is her agent? Roman Polanski?

Like I said, I’m no prude I just prefer my adult entertainment to be made for and by adults. If Cyrus wants to strip than let me know when she’s 25 or so and I’ll go to the Pink Rhino to catch her feature dancing, but let’s keep the kids out of the loop on this one.

4 thoughts on “Miley Cyrus: Exploited Teen or Hipster Douchebag?

  1. Ew.

    Unfortunately, every generation has their horrible girl role-models. When I was a kid, it was Madonna (“Like a Virgin”, etc.), and not so long ago (and still) was Britney Spears, and I don’t know of all the ones in-between. At one point, my 12 year old niece was dancing “sexy” like her, wearing micro-mini’s.

    Unfortunately, they seem to be getting worse with each new one.

  2. Rob, I saw the video and the pole dancing segment was actually tamer than some of the leg spreading and thrusting as Miley danced around the stage. Everything about this kid’s career screams exploitation. As for the hipster element, well, she never really had a fighting chance, did she?

    DodiaFae, I was weaned on Madonna and Cyndi Lauper, but mostly that meant wearing rubber bracelets, tacky sunglasses, and fingerless lace or mesh gloves. No one bought me Madonna’s bustier. I think there’s a fundamental difference today. Every store at the mall that caters to tweens and teens sells short shorts with suggestive words emblazoned across the ass and there are salons that specialize in teen bikini waxing. And parents are buying this stuff. It’s basically mainstream to allow your child to present herself as a sexual object.

    And you’re right, it’s getting worse with each new Britney or Miley.

  3. I loved Cyndi Lauper! I had a pair of hot pink (as in day-glow) short-shorts when I was in middle school. My sister had a pair, too. We nearly caused a motorcycle accident one day while out walking. And we both used to “borrow” our older sister’s clothes, some of which was not appropriate. But at least none of it said “sexy” on the ass.

    I’ve seen six year old girls wearing stuff like that. It’s disgusting to see a child wearing short-shorts (or even low-cut pants or low-cut sweats) that say “sweet thing” across the ass. They even sell this shit at Walmart. And have you seen the swimsuits they sell for little girls these days? I tell you, it’s a pedophiles paradise out there. Disgusting. And these “role models” only make it worse, make it seem OK for little girls to dress like tramps.

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